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dun dun duuuun.....dun dun duuuuuuuuuuun

Tue, 21 Jul 2009 10:15:47 GMT

I'm a sucker for sentiment. Earlier this week before the MLB All-star game, Barack Obama threw out the first pitch, then was followed with a montage of all these historic baseball moments narrated by no. 44 Obeezy as well as the four remaining living presidents. I was crying like a baby! Choking up like I was watching Boyz II Men's video for "It's So Hard to Say Goodbye to Yesterday." (I fucking dare you to YouTube that shit and not get misty eyed.) I've truly bought into the majesty, mystique and awe of America's pastime. I'm thinking it's because of Ken Burns' Baseball.

I've decided that as soon I can save up for it, my summer vacation will be a ridiculously awesome roadtrip visiting all of America's ballparks. The more I think about it the more I get all bright-eyed. Peanuts and cracker jacks. The smell of hot dogs and garlic fries. Delicious beer at 11 a.m. on a Sunday. The long ball. All the storied rivals. New York/Boston. St. Louis/Chicago. Atlanta/Philadelphia. Los Angeles/San Francisco. Minnesota/Cleveland.

AMERICA.

Who's with me?

I love you, Michael

Wed, 01 Jul 2009 19:49:38 GMT

Is what everyone should say who was a kid in the 80s. Not only for his amazing pop music, but because every 80s kid went to Disneyland to see Captain EO. Here's that classic 3-D movie in its entirety, sans the 3-D.

Some Michael goodness

Fri, 26 Jun 2009 22:15:17 GMT

The man made beautiful music, make no mistake. Like this:

I also love this Z-Trip remix of I Want You Back. Motown let him fuck with the original master tapes and he did not disappoint:

The man lived in squalor, controversy, and flashing lights. Nobody deserves to rest in peace more than Michael Jackson.

mama say mama sa ma ma cu sa

Fri, 26 Jun 2009 09:00:00 GMT

Do any of you know how monumental and classic Thriller and Off the Wall are? Michael made the best pop music, fruitiness aside. Anyway, here's a classic cover:

Fri, 26 Jun 2009 00:15:08 GMT

If you or anyone you know would like to live with two wild and crazy guys in San Francisco, link them to this here craigslist post: http://sfbay.craigslist.org/sfc/roo/1238684555.html

Tue, 23 Jun 2009 19:05:26 GMT

The Beastie Boys just released the track list for the new album, and I must say these are some of the best song titles I've ever seen.

1. Tadlock's Glasses
2. B-Boys In The Cut
3. Make Some Noise
4. Nonstop Disco Powerpack
5. OK
6. Too Many Rappers (featuring NAS)
7. Say It
8. The Bill Harper Collection
9. Don't Play No Game That I Can't Win (featuring Santigold)
10. Long Burn The Fire
11. Bundt Cake
12. Funky Donkey
13. Lee Majors Come Again
14. Multilateral Nuclear Disarmament
15. Pop Your Balloon
16. Crazy Ass Shit
17. Here's A Little Something For Ya

I already heard "Lee Majors Come Again" and it's this awesome electro-punk-hip-hop freakout. Stores might as well sell this as non-taxable produce because it's BANANAS. Peep game:

Lee Majors Come Again - Beastie Boys
by cyd125

Nobody likes you, you're ugly and your mother dresses you funny. Now smile, you fucking douche.

Thu, 11 Jun 2009 22:10:57 GMT

I like to live vicariously through David Duchovny's Hank Moody in Californication. He's a stagnant writer who says the wittiest shit and somehow gets to have sex with tons of beautiful women. In his words, "I lead a disgusting life, but I'm not unhappy about it." I kinda wish I could live by these words:

"A few things I've learned in my travels through this crazy little thing called life: 1. A morning of awkwardness is far better than a night of loneliness. 2. I probably won't go down in history, but I will go down on your sister. and 3. While I'm down there, it might be nice to see a hint of pubis. I'm not talking about a huge 70s Playboy bush or anything, just something to remind me that I'm performing cunnilingus on an adult."

Alas, I love video games and hate working out. Eh, I'll be content watching Hank.

Tue, 09 Jun 2009 19:11:48 GMT

I think I may be a middle-aged woman, 'cus I spend my daytime watching cooking shows like Bobby Flay and Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares. Bobby Flay made the bombest Italian meatballs and chicken parmigiana just now, and it's just so fun to watch Ramsay get fucking pissed.

The album of the year hasn't even come out yet. It drops Sept. 9 when Mayer Hawthorne releases "A Strange Arrangement." He's bringing back that sweet barbershop soul, y'all!

Now I'm gonna listen to the new Mos Def and prep myself for the Lakers game tonight.

Thu, 04 Jun 2009 23:12:01 GMT

Man, I really, really love girls. I wish it was acceptable to just nonchalantly tell them they're beautiful without it becoming some kind of awkward moment. I mean, I'm not even trying to hook up, just want to acknowledge that you left the house looking like a superstar.

Anyways, go Lakers.

This is going to be a messy post

Tue, 02 Jun 2009 18:31:33 GMT

Just got done with a 2nd phone interview for a textbook publishing company and I think it went freakin' awesome.

I haven't seen Fanboys yet, but my eyeballs want to throw a party every time I see Kristen Bell rockin the slave Leia bikini on the cover. My eyes also get super giddy every time I see the sexy new ad campaign for Weeds Season 4: http://www.sho.com/site/weeds/home.do

Holy crap that green corset and undie set gives me the chills! Mary Louise Parker is hot as shit!

I saw Up last night, and that film is fucking great. The beginning montage was so good, it literally moved me to tears.

Conan's Tonight Show debut rocked. I thought it very fitting that his first guest was Will Ferrell since he really is one of our generation's comedic geniuses, and that his first musical act was Pearl Jam since our generation still believes music from the '90s is far superior.

Day off today, I'm probably going to peep Drag Me to Hell because I heard it was beautiful.

Tue, 19 May 2009 05:08:45 GMT

Button-fly jeans are the worst thing to wear when you really need to pee.

Do I have to put these handcuffs on your mama?

Fri, 15 May 2009 19:11:14 GMT

Let me take you back, way back. To the days when listening to Ice Cube was actually a fun thing to do.

My new favorite show is 30 Rock

Tue, 12 May 2009 06:03:34 GMT

I've never seen it, but Mike D and Adrock from the Beastie Boys are going to be on this week's episode. So it must be good. Last TV show they were on was Futurama and we all know how freakin' rad that show is.

More buttery goodness via Mayer Hawthorne

Fri, 08 May 2009 18:57:07 GMT

Bad News: Manny Ramirez got popped for a drug violation, Derek Fisher got suspended for tonight's game, and Los Angeles sports suffered quite possibly one if its darkest days yesterday. I still don't have a good job.

Good News: I've got a phone interview next week with a major college textbook publisher, the Lakers are playing tonight, and an awesome dude by the name of Mayer Hawthorne is putting out a full-length LP soon this year.

I freakin' love this guy. Get down with this if you like getting down to Art Laboe dedications.

Finger lickin' good, y'all

Wed, 06 May 2009 21:46:51 GMT

I just got tickets to the Beastie Boys at the Hollywood Bowl this Sept., which should be nothing short of FUCKING EPIC. Holy shit it's gonna sound gooooooood.

Best song/video of 2009 so far

Thu, 30 Apr 2009 17:43:50 GMT

I'm sorry, but I can't stop yelling 'cus then I'd look weak

Fri, 24 Apr 2009 20:47:34 GMT

There was a point in my life where I was the shit: an undergrad already doing kickass work in A&E journalism. Now my life is shit: a college graduate who sells DVDs to nice old ladies. I feel like Kenny Powers from Eastbound and Down. I used to be a bulletproof tiger. Now I need to get my fucking pitch back.

Also, I have a romantic longing to be in Los Angeles. There's just too many things there that I love: tacos, street art, Golden Apple Comics, music, the Beat Junkies, Dodgers, Lakers, cholas. I'm to the point where I believe only a chola would want to get with me 'cus I'm a chubby Dodgers fan who listens to hip-hop, Morrissey and the Cure. Only cholas think that's hot.

So to sum it up, shit kinda sucks right now, working a menial job in a city I like but don't love with little to no chance of hooking up with gangster Mexican girls. And I'm in my mid-twenties. Holy fuck this is a rut if I ever seen one.

Clip of the day

Wed, 15 Apr 2009 21:31:48 GMT

Fuck TNT, 'cus this shit is drama.

Flesh of the Stars

Mon, 30 Mar 2009 19:12:38 GMT

So I've been working on a new website with some awesome bros of mine and I'd like all of you to check it out -- www.thedopereport.com

No, we don't list your favorite actresses nude scenes and how long into the movie it is. Instead we make funny observations at today's drug culture(which will definitely include Seth Rogen coverage). If it isn't your thing, please just peep it out of your love and support for me, because we're working damn hard on it. And don't hesitate to pass the word along to your friends who love watching Half Baked and Blow, and to those who also like to get baked and do blow. While it all looks like fun and games, we are putting a whole lot of passion and work into this, so I really appreciate your back. Support the one's who support you.

Once again --
www.thedopereport.com

www.thedopereport.com

www.thedopereport.com

Holy ridiculous wow!

Wed, 25 Mar 2009 19:56:18 GMT

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck:

Already 80,000 times better than Watchmen.

Also, be on the lookout 'cus soon I've actually got something personal to say. I can't even remember the last time I wasn't talking about the Lakers, movies, video games, and other stupid shit on my lj.

Thu, 12 Mar 2009 20:30:54 GMT

I am 26 now. Kobe Bryant won three championships before 26. I really need to step up this year.

Ruining credit in '09

Mon, 09 Feb 2009 23:32:13 GMT

So I'm beginning the new year spending a shit ton of money I don't really have. God bless you, SonyCard. Like to hear it, here it goes.

First off, I plunked down a buck 30 on the Paul's Boutique 20th anniversary edition. This album is leaps and bounds muy importante, people! Which is why I couldn't settle on just a chump copy of a CD or 180-gram vinyl. Instead I will get both, as well as a limited edition t-shirt, an 8-foot poster of the album art, and all kinds of digital download goodness.

I then put down yet another $130 on the Nike Zoom Kobe IV's. Oh my God, they're gorgeous! Plus it's Kobe Bryant. Kobe!!!

And finally, I locked up my Watchmen IMAX tickets a whole damn month in advance. Six tix costs a hundred bucks, fuuuuck!

BTS. Born to shop. Buy that shit. Big time spender.

Commentary on Michael Phelps

Wed, 04 Feb 2009 19:21:02 GMT

Dude won like, 80 gold medals and he still isn't allowed to enjoy just one bong toke? Fuck America.

We all live on in photos and paperbacks

Wed, 28 Jan 2009 22:52:09 GMT

These dudes are reuniting and I'm the only pumped mutherfucker outside of Sacramento:

FAR - Mother Mary (Official Music Video) - Watch more funny videos here

Fuck You Heroes

Tue, 27 Jan 2009 20:18:48 GMT

I spent my whole weekend with these dudes. Click here to read about it.